The Moon in your chart tells what has you feel safe, secure and well taken care of. If you satisfy your Lunar needs, you are able to relax, rest deeply and engage in the healthy form of self-care that matters most to you.

Your Moon sign is the key to experiencing deep emotional well-being and happiness. 

Do you have the Moon in Libra in your astrology chart?

If you do, then you need October’s free teleclass from Pandora Astrology.

Pandora Astrology Moon in Libra infographic

How to find out more:

The infographic above can only hint at the deeper understanding of your Moon in Libra that astrology has to offer.  To find out more about Moon in Libra (in your chart or in the chart of someone you share a home with or care about), get this teleclass recording: Moon in Libra Teleclass Video.

The Moon In Libra Teleclass is an MP4 video recording lasting approximately 50 minutes and costing $19.97.
To get the recording, use this webpage for a fast and easy MP4 download. May it feed your soul!

If you don’t have the Moon in Libra, you can find out about YOUR Moon sign by joining the free teleclass for it, coming up this year:

Sign Up For Free Moon Sign Teleclasses



Categories: Moon, Signs: Libra

Saturn in your chart points down a career path that can satisfy you and bring you success.

Knowing your Saturn sign orients you, motivates you and gets you unstuck.

Do you have Saturn in Libra in your astrology chart?

If you do, then you need October’s free teleclass from Pandora Astrology.

How to find out more:
The infographic above can only hint at the deeper understanding of Saturn in Libra that astrology has to offer. To find out more, get this teleclass call recording: The Great Work of Libra.

In it, you’ll discover:

  • What’s behind Saturn in Libra’s greatest fear—and crowning achievement
  • More about apt career directions for you if you have Saturn in Libra
  • Libra’s Mission Orders—and how fulfilling on them can bring success and satisfaction

The Great Work of Libra is an MP3 recording lasting approximately 45 minutes and costing $9.97.
To get the recording, use this webform (the same one used for signing up for the teleclasses as they happen) for a fast and easy MP3 download. May it speed your success!

You have Saturn in Libra if you were born in these dates:

  • 10/7/1921 to 12/19/1923
  • 4/6/1924 to 9/13/1924
  • 11/20/1950 to 3/7/1951
  • 8/13/1951 to 10/22/1953
  • 9/21/1980 to 11/29/1982
  • 5/6/1983 to 8/24/1983
  • 10/29/2009 to 4/7/2010
  • 7/21/2010 to 10/5/2012

If you don’t have Saturn in Cancer, you can find out where YOU have Saturn here.

Libra heart 1Do you love a Libra?
Are you a Libra in love?

Human relationships are complex, layered things.  Every sign responds to love differently and has needs that are particular to it.  Also no individual can be categorized by their Sun sign alone.  Every person is a mixed bag of astrological traits, but an emphasis on Libra in your chart (or its ruling planet, Venus) will result in distinctly Libran experience.  In particular, if you have the Sun or Moon in Libra OR if you have Venus or Juno in Libra, this article is just for you.

Are you a Libra in love?
Have you noticed that sometimes you can fall in love with love itself?  The sensation of love and the romance that goes with it is intoxicating to a Libra.  And when that sensation takes you over, it’s easy to give too much or to yield too much.  Here we find Libra’s core dilemma—is it better to love or to be loved?  It gets tiresome being the nice guy and you may prefer to have the power of the relationship in your own hands and to be able to pull a partner in at will.  For this reason, ultimately you prefer to charm and seduce rather than pursue.  Why chase someone who isn’t really interested—and who can’t be wrapped around your finger?  That just throws you—and the relationship—off balance.

How to manage your relationships as a Libra. . .
Fairness is one of the most important factors in a relationship for Librans, but striking the balance between giving too much (which is Libra’s natural tendency) and taking too much (to compensate for over-giving) is hard—especially for the Scales.  Your desire to be rational is very right-minded, but how do you know what’s really fair in every situation?  Your mind doesn’t have the whole answer.  It can come up with endless, perfectly logical lists of reasons why to do A or B, but without arriving at a clear conclusion.  For that, you need your gut.  Get good at consulting your emotions, Libra, and decisions—and decisive action—will get easier.

Do you love a Libra?
Do you ever get the feeling that your Libra is just a little bit. . . vain?  Does your Libra secretly like holding all the cards by being “the cute one” in the relationship?  Is the idea of making a decision on his own excruciating for your Libra?  What will happen when your Libra ages beyond the cute years?  Has she gotten lazy, accustomed to getting by on charm?  How does your Libra know what’s really fair?  These things may be a minor annoyance for you, but for your Libra, they are a real problem and if you can help with them, you will prove invaluable to your Libra.  Begin by respecting your Libra’s mind, rather than getting distracted by his/her smoke-and-mirrors charm and beauty.

If you have Venus or Juno in Libra in your chart, the chances of you dating Librans is very high.  How to handle the Libra you love. . .

  • Appreciate the effort she puts into bringing beauty into your life—then tell her that you love her for her inner beauty, not her outer beauty
  • Encourage him to quit being such a “Mr. Nice Guy”
  • Remind her to stand up for herself and to check her emotions for a decisive answer, rather than arguing both sides until total lack of clarity ensues
  • Encourage him to practice making decisions without asking your opinion first, and also without overthinking them
  • When he plays Devil’s Advocate, consider that perhaps he is just presenting a counterpoint for the sake of balance and not because he believes it.  Ask him what he actually thinks and feels about it.
  • Libra’s polished and rational ways can lead to superficiality.  Although it’s distasteful, being a little less civilized (for once!) and a bit more raw might be a good antidote.

How to find out more:
In this article there’s only room to hint at the deeper understanding of Libra that astrology has to offer.  To find out more about being a Libra in Love or loving a Libra, get this teleconference call recording:

In it, you’ll discover:

  • Why your Libra can be fiercely argumentative, but also delightfully sweet–and why tough decisions are like kryptonite for Librans
  • What your Libra needs in order to sink into committed relationship with you
  • Signs Libra is most compatible with, and why
  • And if you are a Libra, you’ll learn the benefits you bring to every relationship you’re in and the relationship-killers you absolutely must avoid

Libra In Love is an MP3 recording lasting approximately 45 minutes and costing $9.97. To get the recording, email me at for a fast and easy MP3 download. You’ll love it!

Check out this EXCELLENT description of Mars in Libra individuals, posted by a blogger whose name I could not find on her blog.

Charming, Strategic, Non-Confrontational
People born with Mars in Libra would rather not fight. They are aggressively peaceful. That may sound oxymoronic, but these are the cool Pink Panther types that derive joy out of killing people with kindness.  The angrier their opponent gets the nicer they will behave. These people wrote the book on remaining cool under pressure.  They actually thrive there.   They will drive their opponent insane with their lack of cooperation in the anger game. These people are usually very skilled debaters. They are usually very good at talking their way out of confrontations and charming their way into their love interest’s bed. They hide their intentions behind manners and chivalry.  They are violently charming, so be very careful trusting these people.  They are experts at hiding possibly dubious intentions behind flowers petals, perfume, and smiles.

A man born with Mars in Libra will be one of the coolest people you will ever meet. He will be. . .

Read more here

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All Air types (people with a strong Gemini, Libra or Aquarius influence in their chart) have some things in common.  They tend to live in their heads and they love abstract thoughts.  They prefer a beautiful theory to a hard reality and they are interested in communication, sharing ideas and networking.  But there are some interesting differences that show up when Air is strong in the chart of a woman as opposed to that of a man.

There’s a marked tendency for Air-type males to be strongly intellectual (leaning toward math and science) and to not develop their social skills, while Air-type females tend to be strongly social and not as math-and-science-oriented as their male equivalents.  Why should this be?  Are men and women really so different physically that the same astrological influences should bear out different results in the bodies of two different natives?  Why do Air-type men grow up to be techies and scientists, while Air-type women grow up to be social mavens?  Why do Air-type women sometimes talk so much and say so little, while Air-type men can be logical to the point of being cold, critical and boring?

It’s not because of biology—it’s that nasty little virus sexism at work again.  Just when we thought we were living in modern times and had evolved into a post-feminist utopia, how uncomfortable to discover that we’re actually still promulgating sexist ideas and limiting our children.

Even today, it’s still ok for men to be smart in ways it’s not ok for women to be.
Boys get rewarded for smarts, while girls get rewarded for social skills.  While both boys and girls are encouraged academically in their younger years, the further the education goes, the less women are encouraged to pursue their studies, especially when it comes to the hard sciences.  This is much, much less true for younger generations, but older generations have a longer view of how far women have come and how far there still is to go.  A potential employer still looks at a woman and thinks, “she’s going to take off and have a family at some point; she’s a flight risk for my company.”

Conversely, women still get taught social skills in a way that men are not.  While mothers explain to daughters the intricacies of social interaction, sons get tossed out into the world to fend for themselves socially, with nothing but their conscience to guide them, and no actual savvy.  This leaves males clueless in many social situations, feeling that women are running circles around them and that every social interaction has layers of meaning that are mysterious and inscrutable.  The result is that an Airy man, who has lots to say, can talk endlessly about his ideas and have no idea that he’s lost his audience.

I’ve done a lot of readings for Air-type women and believe me—they know how smart they really are and they know that all the gossiping, chattering and superficial bantering is survival behavior and they are tired of not being taken seriously as an intellectual force.  And readings I’ve done for Air-type men have clued me in that, while they easily identify with their intelligence, that intense focus on the life of the mind can result in a boorish cluelessness that is very off-putting to exactly the people they’d most like to impress.

If you are one of these Airy folks, you might want to ask yourself if you’re living the full potential of your Air nature.  It’s your God-given right to be both intellectual and social, but because of lingering gender roles you may have to fight for that right.  For both genders, the key to Air lies in good questions.  Ask intelligent questions as if you really want to know.  Be curious—both about people and ideas.  In conversation draw people out.  The wonder and curiosity we all had when we were small is the heart of Air intellectual and social skills.  Learn to ask good questions and you’re set.  If you have an Airy person in your life, encourage them to develop both sets of Air skills.  If you have an Air-type child, it’s your duty to counteract these social trends and make sure your boy learns to communicate warmly with others and your girl takes her smarts seriously.

Thank goodness these things are changing, and rapidly.  Today it’s more common to see a proud “geek girl” who worries more about her grades or her research than her hairstyle or the latest gossip.  And it’s more common to meet a boy who is socially adept without seeming too much of a “sensitive New Age guy.”  Perhaps a balance will be struck at last.

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Why is it that Libran types are so darned lovable and easy to get along with?  It’s because Librans are born under the influence of Venus, and with the goddess of Love & Beauty on their side, they have mad social skills.  Funny thing is, Librans are attractive even when they are arguing a tough point.  Here are just a few of the many abilities of this Air sign:

1.    As a natural matchmaker, Libra is most content when people are getting along. Libra loves relating for its own sake and is deeply interested in relationships between all human beings.  Libra is fascinated with the ways people connect and the reasons why they hit it off.  Your local Libran is never so happy as when she matches up two people (whether professionally or romantically) and a mutually beneficial association results.

2.    Libra is always thinking of the other person, which has its benefits and its challenges.  It’s natural for a Libran to think of others more than himself and so he is all too prone to giving himself away to make room for the other person to be heard and to get what she wants.  This tendency to negotiate away all his own rights gets Libra into trouble sometimes, but it also forms the foundation for other useful and attractive traits.

3.    Libra has a Devil’s Advocate side and can argue a position strongly. Some of Libra’s favorite words are “But on the other hand . . .” because to Libra, there’s always another position.  This gets Libras into a lot of arguments, because when a Libran hears a strong opinion, her first and most natural reaction is to bring up the opposite view.  This gives Libras the reputation for being argumentative, which isn’t exactly so.  Libras want to be sure all the possibilities are examined, that’s all.

4.    No sign is better at looking for the common ground between two seemingly irreconcilable positions than Libra—he really knows how to sweeten the deal.  Libra is a natural mediator and can find that common ground.  Libra is adept at seeing both positions in a dilemma, refusing to take sides and instead offering solutions that give both sides what they need.  Libra is willing to compromise and balance “take” with “give.”

5.    Libra has a strong, almost physical sense of fairness and justice.  When things are unfair, Libra feels it keenly and miscarriages of justice break the Libran heart.  This is so whether it is Libra himself or another person entirely who is the object of unfairness.  Libra simply finds injustice deeply wrong and injurious to the human soul.  This Libran trait is rooted in a deep love of symmetry, harmony and balance, which leads directly to the firm Libran belief that rules and agreements can be both loving and fair, and can bring out the best in everyone.

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Or see what kinds of readings are available. 

Birthday Gift for you: 
If your birthday is approaching or recent 
and you want an empowering look at the year ahead, click to
schedule a 
Birthday Reading and receive a free gift with it.

This is a repost of an article originally posted in the San Francisco Bay Area Women’s Journal.  You can read the original here.



Categories: Signs: Libra

Solutions for Air-Gone-Wrong

In my recent post Personality Flaws of the Four Elements I described ways the 4 Elements can go wrong, each according to its own nature.

How To Know If Air Has You Lost In A Cloud

Air is the intellectual element and we all know that a mind is a terrible thing to waste—yet it is also possible to use your mind too much, for example in times when your heart or body would serve better.  Your Air has gone wrong when:

  • You retreat to your head so much and get so abstracted that people around you wonder where you’ve gone and call you an “absent-minded professor.”
  • Physical reality annoys you.  You are frustrated at how hard it is to turn a theory into a reality—why can’t things just be the way you think they should?  And so you criticize things and people that don’t live up to your ideals.
  • Your need to appear smart has overreached your ability to actually converse with others, share ideas and be genuinely curious about perspectives that differ from your own.  This alienates you from people, which is a shame because stimulating conversation is exciting to you.
  • Your school success didn’t translate into the world beyond academics and you are still wondering why intelligence and problem-solving abilities aren’t enough to bring recognition and career advancement.
  • People call you cold or unapproachable (even though you have a sparkling wit) because you have little warmth.

Solution One:  Balance Air With The Other 3 Elements
If your Air is distorted, the other elements can help restore balance.  The natural antidote for the coolness and excessive objectivity of Air is the warmth and emotional approachability of Water.  When your Airy side causes you to distance yourself from events around you, draw on your Watery side and involve yourself emotionally in what you are experiencing (even though your Airy side may find this uncomfortable).

Earth helps Air move from the theoretical to the practical.  Earth demands that Air’s ideas be implemented in ways that are useful and pragmatic.  Earth physicalizes Air’s theories, tests them and proves their effectiveness.

Fire brings to Air a much-needed enthusiasm.  There comes a time when thought necessarily leads to action and while Air could sit around the planning table endlessly batting ideas about, Fire will leap in and begin a thing.  This may lead to failure the first or even the hundredth time, but Fire knows the importance of taking action.

Solution Two:  Emphasize Healthy Air
If you emphasize healthy Air and fill your life with ways your Air is positively expressed, there will be no room for unhealthy Air.  This elegant solution gently allows negative Air traits to fall away as a side-effect of your emphasis on positive Air.  You might call this solution “Air -Fu.”  Here are some examples:

  • Be endlessly curious.  Become a reservoir, a roundhouse for information.  Regard all data as potentially useful.
  • Air may not be very warm and fuzzy, but it is very social.  Make friends—lots of them—and bond with them around mutually interesting concepts and theories.
  • Share ideas with absolutely everyone, regardless of how “smart” they are or how well-researched their information is.  Treasure each new nugget you learn.
  • Use your capacity for distancing yourself to help you connect with others, not push them away.  Because intimacy includes appropriate space, you can find the right distance to make you comfortable with intimacy.
  • Meditate.  It gives the brain a much-needed break.

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Coming up next:  Are You Drowning In Water?

Hera by Crystal RoseRecently I’ve posted about Venus and how your Venus sign tells what you long for in relationship and how you act when you don’t get it.  Today I’m concentrating on Juno.

Introducing Juno, Goddess of Committed Relationship
If you’re wondering why you’ve never heard of Juno, that’s because Juno is an asteroid in the asteroid belt that sits between the orbits of Mars and Jupiter.  The asteroid belt contains thousands of asteroids, but only the 4 largest are in common use by astrologers (Juno, Vesta, Pallas-Athene, Ceres).  Juno represents committed relationship or marriage and the sign she occupies in your chart will tell what kind of person you look to marry and what your marital expectations are.  Juno will also tell whether you’re “the marrying kind.”  It’s possible to get a very complete picture of the ways marriage will be easy or hard for you by looking at Juno in your chart. If you don’t know where Juno is in your chart, you can use to make your chart and find out.

How Literal Is This Marriage Thing—Does Juno Mean Marriage Only?
Um, NO.  Juno is about committed relationship.  If you are in a committed relationship with someone you cannot or will not legally marry (for example, if you’re gay & cannot get married), things I’m saying about Juno still apply to you.

What follows is a very brief (and of course incomplete) set of interpretations for Juno in the signs:

Juno in Aries expects that marriage is an adventure.  This Juno wants to experience freshness and newness everyday, a continual rebirth and renewal of commitment.  If this Juno cannot speak the truth and experience excitement, she will wander.

Juno in Taurus wants and expects unflinching stability.  This Juno will stand by the partner through good times and bad, and expects the same in return.  Cooking with the partner and having a financially stable marriage will support this Juno’s commitment.

Juno in Geminineeds a quality of lightness in marriage.  She doesn’t like to be tied down and is prone to living a double life unless all her attention can be engaged.  Her best marriage involves lots of communication, both talking and listening.

Juno in Cancercan get very domestic because this Juno intuits that a well-feathered nest and raising children are the ultimate reason for marrying.  She also expects that marriage is a place for an ever-deepening emotional connection.  She’s a caretaker.

Juno in Leo expects that her marriage and her partner must look good.  She tends to marry radiant, larger-than-life types who can be domineering behind the scenes. If you ever embarrass her in public, be prepared for the cold shoulder afterwards.

Juno in Virgo is as selective as Venus in Virgo, and twice as critical. She will serve the partner endlessly, hoping to improve them. Shaping and molding the partner are tempting but this Juno is much better off turning her perfectionist talents toward meaningful work instead.

Juno in Libra wants to be on a level with the spouse and experience true, balanced partnership. She’s always willing to sit down and negotiate or talk things out, as long as it doesn’t get too messy or dark. When they do, she needs harmony before going deeper.

Juno in Scorpio expects that marriage is a deep merging of two-in-one, mind, body & soul and she will consider it her right to know everything possible about the partner before and after marrying them.  Choosing the right partner in the first place is crucial.

When a Juno in Sagittarius person is happily married, s/he feels that marriage is a freedom, not a limitation.  For this Juno, marriage needs to involve unending growth and expansion—if there’s not room for that, marriage is not worth committing to.

Juno in Capricorn takes marriage with the utmost seriousness.  She sees marriage as a social contract in which both partners agree to support each other’s reputation and keep each other looking good.  Humiliate her and you’ll lose her (considerable) devotion.

Juno in Aquariuswould rather not get married at all, quite frankly, and will only be attracted to someone unusual enough to grab her attention.  She is aware of the political ramifications of marriage and doesn’t want to give up her power or freedom.

Juno in Pisces dreams of the ultimate partner, which can get in the way of living with a real human being in the here-and-now.  She may have trouble giving herself completely to marriage but seeing it as a spiritual connection makes commitment & fidelity stick.

Go To Bed As Venus, Wake Up As Juno
If you’ve read all the articles in this 3-part thread, it should be pretty obvious by now how having Venus & Juno in incompatible positions might spell some relationship challenges.  There comes a time in every relationship of duration when you ask yourself, “does this relationship have what it takes to last?”  It’s as if you flip from the lover-seeking side of you to the side that assesses mate material and it can happen overnight.  For many people, this question pops up somewhere between 4 and 6 months into dating someone new.  Up to that point, the Lover in you was happy enough to keep you sticking around this person.  Now the Mate in you pops up and gets you looking at more serious concerns.

Do Your Expectations for Marriage Conflict With Your Romantic/Erotic Needs?
Most people have some kind of challenge around making the transition from love to commitment and that’s because love and commitment are actually two different archetypal functions within human personality.  Juno shows what you need in a committed relationship, but Venus shows what you need in order to fall in love and to maintain a romantic, erotic connection over time.  The ultimate situation occurs when you can have it all—you experience a deep, committed connection with someone which can last a lifetime and inside that connection you feel wildly and passionately in love.  This is a wonderful state and it is attainable by everyone, no matter how challenged Venus and Juno might be in your chart and no matter how fiercely they might be challenging each other.  It’s simply a matter of figuring out all your needs and honoring them all, without sacrificing one for the other.

Own Your Juno
What I said in my recent Venus post applies here too:  own your Juno, rather than projecting her qualities onto a mate.  Become the mate you need.  This will make you more marriageable and will make married life sustainable for you.  Then you can relax into a lifetime of happy marriage with exactly the amount of depth or freedom or emotional bonding or passion or excitement that you want.  The interpretations I’ve listed above are just a smidgen of what Juno has to offer in terms of really understanding your marital needs.

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Articles in this 3-part thread:
Do Love & Marriage Really Go Together Like A Horse & Carriage?
The Key To Love, Romance and Hot Sex—Venus Tells All
How To Have A Happy Marriage—Juno Tells All

Art by Crystal Rose

Botticelli's Birth of VenusIn my previous post, I talked about the experience people often have that love and marriage just don’t mix for them.  It’s as if Venus, the part of us that falls in love, is arguing with Juno, the part of us that marries.  But if we find out what each of these parts really wants and we satisfy them both, it’s possible to have a stable, consistent relationship you can count on, along with all the love, romance and erotic connection you can handle.

If you don’t know where Venus is in your astrology chart, you can make your own chart on to find out.

What Venus Wants According To Her Sign
Venus in Aries wants a partner who’s honest, direct and fiery.  This Venus is impulsive about love and wants a strict “No Phonies!” zone.  When this Venus is unhappy, she is irritable, annoyed and picks fights with the partner, possibly even getting physical.

Venus in Taurus
wants touch, physical affection and languorous sensuality.  Don’t rush this one!  Oh, and did I mention shopping and fine food?  When this Venus is unhappy, she eats to feel better or participates in unwanted sex just for the physical affection.

Venus in Gemini can be distractible and it takes a very intelligent partner to hold her attention.  Give her mental stimulation or she’ll get bored!  When this Venus is unhappy, she is a flight risk and will seek more intellectually interesting partners elsewhere.

Venus in Cancer loves the feeling of being in love and craves emotional connection above all.  Although she’s a caretaker, she secretly longs to be taken care of.  When this Venus is unhappy she smothers the partner with excess emotional care and needs.

Venus in Leo is an exhibitionist.  She wants a lover she can be proud of.  She’ll lord it over her partner if allowed to, but what she really wants is a partner as royal as she is.  When this Venus is unhappy she develops a superiority or inferiority complex.

Venus in Virgo is such a perfectionist.  Sometimes it seems she’ll never be pleased.  But in quiet moments she’ll confess to liking the process of perfecting so much that she hopes it will all never be done.  When this Venus is unhappy, she nags and criticizes.

Venus in Libra loves beauty and can be captivated by it, but will always be won over by being treated with true fairness.  She wants to be on a level with the partner.  When this Venus is unhappy she first capitulates, then ultimately seeks a more equitable relationship.

Venus in Scorpio desires to be swept away by love.  Sometimes her instincts steer her wrong and lead to awful relationships, but her passion to love is overwhelming.  When this Venus is unhappy she gets manipulative, controlling and emotionally dramatic.

Venus in Sagittarius
needs freedom and space.  You can’t tie this one down—she’ll run away.  You can hold her attention by travel and continual growth.  When this Venus is unhappy she flirts up other people to remind herself that she is attractive and deserving.

Venus in Capricorn tends to think relationship has to be work.  She has a stamp on her forehead that says “Expensive, but worth it.”  She wants a partner who is very solid in their career.  When this Venus is unhappy she turns stoic, working harder & harder on the relationship before giving up.

Venus in Aquarius has no clear pattern—seems like her every relationship is different from the one before.  Nothing less than genius will hold her attention.  When this Venus is unhappy she will rebel, reacting in unexpected ways until she gets what’s wanted.

Venus in Pisces is the Dream Lover.  She wants a union of souls.  She can get anyone she wants by becoming their ultimate object of desire.  This is a powerful ability that can be abused.  When this Venus is unhappy she gives until she’s exhausted, then floats away, hoping to avoid confrontation.

Now that was a batch of extremely brief and punchy interpretations for Venus—by no means exhaustive of course.  But it begins to give us an idea what this capricious archetype longs for.  And if you give Venus what she longs for, the result is you get to experience love, romance, connectedness and hormonal bliss.

The Venus Pitfall
One pitfall that people frequently get into is the tendency to look for our own Venus traits outside ourselves, in the shape of another person.  We think that if we can just get into relationship with someone who exemplifies these traits, we’ll have found “the One” and bliss will naturally ensue.  But real human relationships are more complex than that and no one wants to be just a screen for their lover’s projections.  Have you ever been in a relationship and woke up to realize that your partner wasn’t really seeing you, but was seeing something they had projected onto you?  We’ve all been on the giving and the receiving end of this behavior and it’s not fun.  Left unchecked, this behavior will become an entrenched pattern that can ruin all your relationships.  But there’s a solution, and it’s easier than you think.  People who declare they have found true love know this solution and live it everyday.

How To Handle A Cranky Venus
The key is to stop projecting Venus out into the world and instead to own and live out your own Venus yourself.  Become the lover you wish you had.  This means that you take on the sign your Venus is in and live it out in the most vibrant, healthy way you can.  A thorough reading of Venus in your chart (and everything attached to or impacting it) can yield a myriad of clues for sides of yourself which, if you develop and own them for yourself (instead of waiting passively for someone to come along and do them for you), will lead inevitably to an increased capacity for passionate love.  And once your capacity to give & receive love is increased, you will stop pushing away the love that’s all around you, right now, but which you cannot see.

When you own and become your own Venus, you become radiantly attractive to your own perfect match.  This happens because you are in love with yourself (in the best possible way) and you’re not approaching others from a needy, grabby place.  Everything you’ve been doing wrong starts to go right.  You become more attractive and charming to people in general and more able to graciously negotiate for what you want in every kind of relationship (whether at work or at home).  And from that new place, passionate, erotic love is a breeze.

A Client’s Story
Here’s a story from a client of mine, reporting back years later after receiving the advice to become his own Venus.

“You gave me some of the best advice I ever received.  I told you that I was always attracted to those aloof, statuesque, Aquarian types, and they always break my heart, because . . . of course, they’re aloof.  And you told me that I need to be more Aquarian—more cool, detached and logical.  To become one of those Aquarian-types I was longing for.  Nothing in my life has worked quite so magically as that little, really quite simple, piece of advice.  Simple for someone who’s not in the middle of it, of course.

Now, I seriously doubt that you ever meant quite the way I took that info and ran with it, but it really worked!  After four years of working on it, I met someone who became my girlfriend (not at all aloof, but still exciting to me), and I moved in with her, and we’ve been together for eight years now.  That felt like the absolute perfect verification of your advice! I was living my Aquarian side, and it paid off for once.”

Actually, the client was wrong—I really did mean for him to take that advice and run with it the way he did.  A client like that, who will make good use of my information, is worth his weight in gold.  And I’ll bet his girlfriend knows it.

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Articles in this 3-part thread:
Do Love & Marriage Really Go Together Like A Horse & Carriage?
The Key To Love, Romance and Hot Sex—Venus Tells All
How To Have A Happy Marriage—Juno Tells All

Not for everybody.  In fact, in many cases, the way a person falls in love is quite different from how they commit to marriage.  This leads to difficulties, as most people will fall in love with the sort of person that turns them on, but who isn’t suitable to marry. After a patchy relationship history, they may give up on love and decide to marry for sensible reasons, but find it impossible to light a spark in their marriage.  What to do?  The solution lies in honoring both sides of ourselves—the side that falls in love and the side that commits—from the very beginning of the process.  But how do we do that, if we don’t know which sides of us those are, and what they want?  Astrology can help, because your style of falling in love and your style of committing are shown clearly in your chart.  Your chart shows these two sides of you, what they need and how to keep them satisfied.

Venus is the Lover in You
Venus is the romantic, erotic side of you, the side that falls in love.  It’s your Venus that feels all those yummy hormones and brain chemicals that are swimming around in your system when you meet somebody attractive.  And it’s Venus that suffers when you “fall out of love” or are rejected.

Venus In Your Chart Can Tell You:

  • What qualities to look for in a lover
  • What “true love” feels like for you
  • What’s in the way of your finding true love
  • And how to maintain love over years and years

But Venus is by no means the whole story, because . . .

Juno Is The Mate In You
Juno is an asteroid in the asteroid belt that runs between Mars and Jupiter in our solar system.  Juno represents the archetypal mate and in your chart she represents your capacity to marry or commit.  She is also the Queen of Heaven, a consummate people-person and matchmaker.

Juno In Your Chart Can Tell You:

  • What qualities to look for in a mate
  • What you value in a marriage and how you behave when you’re committed
  • What you need to be able to hold onto a committed relationship over time
  • And what’s in the way of commitment for you—as well as how to solve that.

When Relationship Worlds Collide
For a few lucky people (about 11%), Venus and Juno are in harmony in their chart and sliding from romance to commitment—and maintaining romance while committed—is pretty easy.  But for most of the rest of us, there’s some kind of conflict between the two, resulting in situations where:

  • You meet somebody you love to date, but the idea of marrying them is inherently repellent, so you have to teach yourself to be attracted to “mate material.”
  • You love dating and cannot stand the idea of marriage or . . .
  • You would love to skip the awful dating process and just settle down with somebody.
  • You keep finding yourself with someone you love and want to marry, but they don’t want that with you and you string yourself along, wasting your time and theirs.
  • You feel like a refugee from a movie where the main character has a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other.  Venus whispers one thing in one ear and Juno whispers something completely different in the other.

It’s enough to drive you crazy.  What to do?

How To Integrate Them
Begin by saying a nice hello to both Venus and Juno.  Thank them for giving you a way to connect to others at all.  Then ask them what they want.  When you find out, accept that this is a real need for you and give it to yourself.  When Venus in Gemini whispers to you “I really like dating smart people,” you’d better listen, because dumb-but-pretty will not hold your attention for long.  When Juno in Sagittarius whispers, “I need somebody adventuresome and free,” don’t go for Mr. Moneybags—he’s too busy worrying about the bottom line to take you traveling.

There is a trick to this, though.  When they ask for stuff that’s bad for you (like enticing you toward that really sexy person you know will be a train wreck to date), don’t listen.  Instead, figure out the healthy version of that thing and give Venus or Juno that.  Instead of getting lost in a codependent mess because Venus in Cancer whispered “I need to be needed,” try looking for someone nurturing and caring but also emotionally independent.  You could get lured into an abusive relationship with someone because Juno in Taurus whispered “I want presents!” and you got distracted by bling.  Instead, settle down with someone solid who likes to cook with you and takes you shopping at sensible intervals.

I’ll be devoting my next two blogposts to what Venus and Juno might want, according to the sign they are in.  You’ll find out what this means for you.

Find out more about getting a reading
Or see what kinds of readings are available. 

Articles in this 3-part thread:
Do Love & Marriage Really Go Together Like A Horse & Carriage?
The Key To Love, Romance and Hot Sex—Venus Tells All
How To Have A Happy Marriage—Juno Tells All

Venus, archetype of love, beauty and relationship, has a dual nature:  one side of her is the sultry sensualist (hedonistic and self-indulgent at the worst) and the other side is the cool, unapproachable beauty (or ice princess at the worst).  How can one archetype have two such different sides?

Every sign of the zodiac has a planet that rules it.  But there are twelve signs and only ten planets,* so that two of those planets have rulership over two signs each.  Venus is one that has two signs, those being Libra and Taurus.

These two signs aptly illustrate the two sides of Venus’ personality.  Libra is more intellectual and distant, the cool, remote beauty, the lovely statue on the pedestal, the unattainable ideal.  Libra is also highly sensitive to beauty, but as an air sign, Libra is more interested in the abstract than the actual; to the Libran mind, a pure, beautiful, balanced idea is a perfect idea.  It doesn’t matter whether the idea can ever manifest in a real, physical form—Libra treasures the idea itself.

Taurus on the other hand, represents the earthier and more sensual side of Venus’ nature.  Taurus is the part of us that lives in the realm of the senses that takes pleasure in hedonistic desire that magnetizes our desire to us.  Taurus is drawn toward objects of beauty, toward fine, well-made objects, and wishes to possess them.  Taurus luxuriates in all things beautiful and delicious.

Libra is also the sign associated with agreements, promises and contracts.  Libra appreciates the rules of a relationship, whereas Taurus appreciates the sensations of being in contact with another person.  Taurus loves physical affection and comfort.

Both signs have their negative side:  Taurus overindulges, becoming a hedonist or gourmand, while Libra becomes a temptress:  cold and unapproachable, standoffish and teasing.  At Libra’s worst, there is the promise of love with no satisfaction; at Taurus’ worst, there is consumption with no satisfaction.  Libra can be the siren, luring sailors to their deaths, while Taurus can be like Tantalus, with the grapes forever dangling above his mouth, perpetually unable to reach them.

A Venusian “type” (someone whose chart shows a strong, centrally placed Venus) may identify with both sides of Venus over time.  This is so whether the native is a woman or a man.  Such a person will struggle with overindulgence as they embrace embodied experience and may at times fall in love with the idea of love.  But the Venusians among us also live lives rich in relationship, both to others, and to themselves.

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* Holding all arguments about Pluto’s status as a planet aside, that is.  Astrologers have not abandoned Pluto just because it’s been demoted by astronomy.  Pluto may be small, but its effects are potent.

Libra is one of the Cardinal signs.  Cardinal means active, motivated, driven.  Cardinality is the quality of beginnings.  This means that Libra is a motion-oriented leader, a sign that starts things.  But how can that be?  Everyone who knows something about Libra knows that Librans are famous for their inability to make decisions.  It’s hard to move forward on something when you feel the need to carefully think through every possible argument for and against it before you take action.  Why on earth is such an inherently indecisive sign also a Cardinal sign?

Libra is all about what’s fair.  This sign, above all others, is motivated to create balance and to give in measure equal to what is received.  Libra is highly sensitive to imbalance.  But it is not really possible for one human being to see into every level of both their soul and the soul of another person and to see what really, truly is fair.  Thus the dilemma:  Libra cannot truly judge what is fair and must deliberate for a long time, asking herself what is the right thing, the fair thing?

So Libran types get paralyzed in indecision, unable to make a choice because they are longing for that still point of perfect balance to be struck.  But perfect balance, even if it is reached, cannot be maintained for long.  And here we find the answer to our question, because what Libra excels at is not static balance (the noun), but the act of balancing (the verb).  Balance is not a static state to be achieved, but an action, continually in progress.  If you think balancing is not active, just try the yoga “tree” pose right now and notice how active and busy your muscles are.

Since Libra is both a Cardinal and an Air sign, the (cardinal) action takes place in the (airy) mental realm.  Libra loves debate, a favorite phrase being “but on the other hand . . .”  The continual search for ideas, arguments and perspectives that will bring a discussion into balance is consummately Libran, very active and very Cardinal.

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When Venus, goddess of love and beauty, claimed Librans for her own, did she curse them to give too much and perpetually be taken advantage of in relationship?

It’s true that Libran types are relaters.  It’s true that someone with strong Libran influence would rather be in a relationship than not.  It’s true that a Venus-kissed individual can lose themselves in love.  But why?

Libra loves the sensation of being in love.  For Libra, falling in love and being in love is never having to worry about what’s fair.  People in love are inherently generous and thoughtful when those happy chemicals are swimming around in their brains.  Fairness is not an issue when you’re in love.  This solves a lot of problems for the Libran individual, who can be over-generous and too thoughtful all the time, whether they are in love or not.

Libra has a strong sense of fairness and balance to begin with.  A Libran type will often give too much in order to correct a perceived imbalance.  In doing so, the Libran can violate their own boundaries and drain away their energy, all in the name of doing the “right” thing, or being kind or being nice.  If Librans are continually drawn to relationship, but then lose themselves in it, what to do?  Librans are at their best when in relationship (whether romance or friendship) with people who give and take in fairly equal measure.  They also do well with people who are inherently generous because the Libran themselves will balance the situation by giving back.

The best thing for Librans to do is to be selective about who they relate with and to keep an eye on their own boundaries.  If that best friend keeps taking advantage or that boyfriend keeps crossing your boundaries, think again.  It may not be love or friendship operating there and you may need to hold a stronger line.  And knowing that you go into the situation with a tendency toward giving and a fascination for romance can equip you to keep taking care of yourself even when the hormones are raging.  And when you give to others, don’t forget to give to yourself too.

Find out more about getting a reading
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Birthday Gift for you: 
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and you want an empowering look at the year ahead, click to
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Astrology blogger since 2007

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